OMG, so much going on lately that I forget what day of the week it is. The one thing I don’t forget, however, is you guys. You are the ones who make it possible for me to be here and I thank each and every one of you.
I run a group on FB for my Middle/Littles and special friends to play and interact. It is so sweet, fun and wonderful that I can’t help but smile when I check in on them. It has become a place to support one another and promote healing and encouragement. There are no outsiders there- only people who share the same interest/desires- the ‘real deal’ of BDSM. I love the men and women there- they are pure, genuine, loving and nonjudgmental.
Something came up- one of my babies was hurting. Bad. And then another and another…. Emails and chats started coming through- well over twenty and all dealing with the same exact issue. Each of them had been wounded by words. Not in their playground- but by those outside. Even worse, the pain had been inflicted- non-consensually and straight to the heart- through internet communications. Chat, groups, e-mails, posts/threads…The power of the abusive cyber word yielded behind a computer screen by a bully became crushing to their spirits and their trust.
What made it worse was the common thread- an author who used her ‘name’ to lure them in and deliberately intimidate, insult and destroy. I also know many other authors as well as readers who have had the same horrible encounters with this person- really wonderful kind, gentle and honest people who had reached out in trust and were met with a psychotic rage. She has trashed me personally countless times on her blog after confronting her with her behavior (jealousy and immaturity are amazing catalysts to bring out the unstable) with comments and stories that just short of laughable and have entered libel.
But I have to ask-
How does an author, or any public figure, expect to be successful when she leaves a wake of bodies in her path? Not one or two—but hundreds?
As authors, I believe we have a responsibility to our readers to deliver truth, compassion and gratitude. Of course, I don’t expect anyone to reveal their home address, real name or even their actual age- but don’t lie about your lifestyle to gain readers! Don’t pretend to be a Domme or falsely support things like Age-Play to manipulate innocent people who are hungering for a real DS experience. Don’t treat your readers like they are disposable- because they are the most precious gift an author could ask for.
Because FB is so precarious with how things are posted, I decided to allow this to be a venting post. We have the power to say no to abuse of any kind- but true power comes with community involvement. If any of my readers have had problems with a cyber-bully- please let me know. I WILL NOT associate OR promote anyone who behaves in that manner. I also recommend that you let a publisher know if someone like this is causing hurt. One or two emails might not do anything, but there is power in numbers. I know my publisher, Blushing Books, will take a stand to protect our readers AND our authors from anyone who threatens to harm them.
As authors- we can only begin to understand how we affect our fans- good or bad. Please feel free to share your personal experiences and feelings- not to judge- but to let others know that they are not alone, singled out, or in any way wrong in how they feel. I will be watching the threads and doing my best to protect you from counter-attacks. The person referred to above is banned from commenting on this site.
16 thoughts on “Wounded by Words”
I thought I was alone, but clearly AV has hurt many others as well. Thank you Breanna and John for highlighting this hurtful problem and making a safe place.
All I can say is that you reap what you sow, so you might as well sow kindness. And I know that things like that will never happen on this blog or anything that Bree and John are involved in. And for that I’m very thankful.
Thank you Sir John! Love you both!
its unfortunate a place that should be a sanctuary is tarnished by these actions. All of you here that are good enough to read the blog deserve to be supported and encouraged, not dismissed and hurt . This person either does not care or is too insensitive to see how she is hurting people and disrespecting the lifestyle.Bree and i give you our word, you will never be treated that way here , you are all a part of our growing d/s family and we protect our family, trust me
You 2 are wonderful SJ and I am so thankful to have you and MamaBree in my life!
I am so sorry to hear this Please everyone if someone is saying hateful things to hurt you Do Not believe them. Remember they are trying to build themselves up by tearing you down. Don’t let them steal your Joy! You are Nothing like those awful things they say they are really just talking about themselves. Hold your head high and know you are Awesome! Listen to the words of your True Friends and love ones and forget what the posers lies they are just trying to hurt and destroy because they are not happy with themselves. As one person stands up against a bully others will have the strength to stand up to and before you know it you will have tons standing up together I am so sorry to all who have been hurt by nasty mean words said by shallow evil people…. Thank you Bree for standing up and
You rock my socks off, Bree. Seriously. You are so loving and caring, and when the Mama Lion comes out everyone beware! 😀
It makes me so sad for everyone, and for that person, that so many were so wounded. But I have to admit it was a relief for me when I realized I hadn’t been alone. That she had a long history of hurting people. I thought there had been something wrong with me and to find out it was something wrong with her took a huge weight off of me.
Thanks for encouraging us to be ourselves!!
Okay, so why won’t anyone say anything? I have been so hurt, degraded, humiliated and lied to by an author by the initials AV- I’m afraid to list my name because she IS insane and scares the hell out of me. I’m bi, so I figured that I could find a place with her fan base. Not so. The insults and rudest comments I have ever heard where shot at me after I attempted to play along with everyone else. I shared the posts with friends and they were appalled. I won’t ever buy one of her books again or participate in any groups that I see her name- and anyone who has her as a ‘friend’ and comments on her posts are dead to me. I’m just one person. May I can’t do much to stop someone who is so vicious and cruel, and pretends to be this big time know it all author who is nothing but a kid who plays at being a professional student and lives in a pretend world. Why do people let it go on and how can it be stopped?
I am so very sorry you were hurt by her. I was also on the receiving end of her nastiness. If it wasn’t for Bree, i would think I was alone in this, but now I know there are so so so many others.
Your such an amazing advocate for all of us, and I’m so thankful for all your loving support and advice when we have a problem and don’t know the answer. Love you MamaBree
Words can hurts so bad and are easy to believe when they come from someone that you trust. I can not believe that a person who relies on fans for they’re success could be so hurtful. I really hope I have not read this person books because I do not want to support that kind of evil. I am really sorry that so many of you were hurt by this person. I know that I do not say much but I have been around and I have not once heard a bad word from this great group of people. It is nice to be part of this postivie group.
I’m so thankful we have you to help us through the negative! Your like a Domme Mother Hubbard! So many littles you don’t know what to do! Love u!!!!
Lol JoAnna that is an adorable analogy. My bet is mother hubbard didn’t weild a hairbrush
Lol. I thought of all of us she tries to keep well and happy. Bless her heart! She maybe wielding more than a hairbrush by time she gets done with us all!!!
not me ’cause I’m perfect and all, but it would be pretty funny to try to see her keep even 2 of your in line in real life. 😉
It would be utterly impossible!!!!