How Often?

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Hello lovelies,

I trust you all are happy and hopefully marked by your Doms as you read this. I am asking a question today of how often…

How often do you think about being spanked? Especially discipline wise?

How often do you surf the net for photos or videos and imagine the sub in those pics and vids is you?

I want you all to remember one important thing when you see those pics or watch those vids, even if they are severe, the main thing is that the Dom is or should be administering the discipline because he cares. Yes, it’s true.

Here at Casa Hayse spankings are given frequently and sometimes just because I want to see a red bottom. Sometimes the spankings are quite severe, but that does not mean I do not care for the subbie, quite the contrary. I care for all my subs.

It’s an interesting line and hard to explain unless you have been over my lap. I would venture to say if you talk to any sub that I have disciplined she will tell you no matter how painful it was she always could feel my caring, certainly through my hand but also using an implement. I wish for all of you to be able to feel this especially if you never have before, and if you do feel this with your Dom you are fortunate indeed.

Bree whines a lot when she’s spanked and a lot of the time she’s not in the mood, which makes no difference to me, lol, but I guarantee if you asked her if she can feel how much I care with every spank or stroke she would say “Yes…but why does he have to spank so hard!!!” Some of you may visit the torture room here someday and you will FEEL what I mean in the meantime…

Be good, or else…

SJ

Over and Done

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Hello my lovelies,

Miss me? I missed you.

I wanted to say, thank you so much for all your support for Bree and I through these crazy stressful times and a special thanks to all of you who were generous enough to give from your hearts. We will be forever grateful.

Now, another question…hypothetical…Let’s say you’re going to visit your Dom and your punishment book is rather full, at least 7 transgressions. You’re staying for a week. Would you rather…

  1. Get all of them taken care of in one huge session then have a clean slate for the week
  2. Do one or two a day until they are all gone.

There are pros and cons for each, of course, but I am curious what you all think.

Be good or else

SJ

 

Lines and Strokes

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Hello lovelies,

I was wondering…

Some of my subbies say they would rather have spanks or strokes rather than write lines. How do you all feel about that?

I am not just talking sit and write lines. I usually have my subbie in the corner bb and then sit and write.

Which do you feel is more of a deterrent for bad behavior?

A sound OTK bb spanking. Maybe the paddle or even the cane…Or…Being sent to the corner bb to write lines about your behavior?

Which do you feel is more of a deterrent for bad behavior?

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Personally I find both very effective especially in the same session, but that’s just me, lol.

Be good, or else…

SJ

Man v. Machine

Hello lovelies,

I don’t know if you are aware but there are quite a few spanking machines out there. Yes, the old fantasy of having a machine to spank your subbie is a reality. I am not saying this is for lazy Doms, lol, just an addition.

The main perk here is for self spanking as there is one major problem with self spanking: arm fatigue. For the majority of you, your arm gives out way before you have spanked hard enough or long enough. Also, you will tend to back off the intensity when it really starts to sting. This is understandable as your sense of self-preservation kicks in. The beauty of the machine is that once its set and in motion it doesn’t let up or get softer as your bottom starts to sting and it never gets tired.

I do phone sessions with all my subs from time to time. I do this to keep the dynamic more personal and also to monitor the spanking. Since I can hear everything there is no way for my subs to cheat and go lighter than I want. If the machine is used it solves that problem and also makes the spanking more painful and intense.

The machine I have has controls for how often the stroke comes and how hard that stroke is. Once its set there is no escape and it’s almost like a true in person punishment. My machine on an 8 with a thin cane will elicit loud screams and nice marks. On a 10 it’s severe. Of course you can set it lower for a pleasure spanking but the real advantage is for punishment.

I have even tried a double caning with Bree. I let the machine give a stroke and as it was setting for the next I gave her one. She did not enjoy it nearly as much as I did.

Now there is the drawback of it being impersonal, after all it is a machine, but if the Dom orders the implement, the number of intensity and sets the timer it’s almost like he’s giving the spanking or paddling or caning etc. The subbie must stay in position or get some strokes in places she does not want them.

I am sure you are all online looking for your machine lol. I think all subbies should have one but that’s just me.

Be good, or else…

SJ

But I Want to be Perfect

 

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Hello lovelies,

I can’t tell you how many times I have heard this from the subbies I work with.  Let me cut to the chase, nobody is perfect and no Dom expects you to be.

When I take on a newbie it’s generally because she has some things she would like help with. Usually there might be some bad habits or behaviors etc. requiring a little more motivation.

Just the nature of that statement should tell you that I expect a newbie to mess up. Otherwise why would she ask for my help?

Let me assure all of you, no Dom expects you to be perfect. I know for a lot of you, pleasing your Dom is very important, and it should be, but don’t beat yourself up when you misbehave or break a rule.

Speaking for myself, this never makes me angry. My subbies will tell you I don’t get mad but breaking a rule over and over does get me frustrated. After I hit that point I begin working on that hole in my music room where I bang my head…and not in the heavy metal way lol.

My point is this… to all my subbies, experienced and newbies, and to all of you that read the posts, don’t try for perfection. It’s not going to happen and when you mess up take your discipline and learn from it. But do not get depressed or upset that you disappointed me or your Doms. Trust me, I know it’s going to happen from time to time.

I mean if you were perfect why would you need a Dom right? However, I am not saying you shouldn’t at least try to be a well behaved subbie but let’s face it, nobody is good 100% of the time. Just know I am aware of that as are you so relax and   just be you. That’s what D/s is all about, a place where you can be who you truly are.

Be good, or else…

SJ

Too Hard, Too Light, Just Right

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Hello lovelies,

I thought I would write something a bit different today. In fact I want you all to interact with me on this. I want your feedback on a topic I was thinking about.

I would like to know what denotes a perfect spanking for you. One that if you were talking to your vanilla friends or sister subbies you would say “man he can really spank.”

There are many layers to consider, I know. I would think you all will differ here and there.

Consider a reward or play spanking. Then a punishment spanking.

All otk? All by hand only? Be as detailed as you like. And of course enjoy!!

Be good, or else…

SJ

Subbie Guilt

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Hello lovelies,

I am sure you are all familiar with this heading yes?  I mean subbie’s have more guilt than anyone I know. I love you all but you know it’s true.

I did a session not too long ago. It was a punishment session resulting in marks and a lot of tears, as these kinds of sessions often do. Now during this session something happened. As you all know I am sadistic, but I am all about you being safe in a session so I monitor you closely.

This particular subbie had been hand spanked to tears and was then put over the spanking bench and secured. Her transgressions were serious so she had a paddling and a caning coming. I decided to use the heart first, which as some of you know burns like fire especially on a sore bottom. During this part of her spanking she began to cry again but her breathing became erratic. That’s wasn’t good as she started to hyperventilate, so much so I had to stop and calm her down before her cane strokes.

I had decided to end the session after the cane as I felt she may be at risk if I went any longer. After calming her down I gave her 12 strokes and she was done. I did aftercare, held her, forgave her and made sure she was ok.

It seemed she was so I went downstairs and she went into the living room. When I came in to check on her she was crying. I asked what was wrong and she said she felt bad she could not take what I had planned for her!

I did say you all have more than your share of guilt to drag around did I not? Lol

I explained to her that it’s never a question of me being disappointed if you can’t take as much as I planned for you . It is always a matter of you being safe. You need to learn a lesson, of course, but not at the expense of your health (physical/mental/emotional).

I want you all to get this…a punishment session is meant to hurt but it’s not a matter of taking so much or disappointing me. Every subbie is different. Some can take a lot, some not so much. The important thing is that you feel punished and can let go of the guilt after. Not to put more guilt on top by thinking you disappointed your Dom by not taking enough , that’s not an issue.

You all have enough guilt. Don’t add to it! Lol.

Be good, or else…

SJ

Feelings and Emotions: Arrrgh!

Hello my lovelies,

How is everyone?

I have a query for all of you and would welcome your input. I was doing a session with one of my subbies, a very sweet newbie. She was not in serious trouble but it was a phone session. It was for a behavior I do not like.

You see, in phone sessions, the subbie cannot fake anything. I hear it all. The self spanks are always much harder and longer.

The session went as usual, and after she was forgiven with hugs I signed off. Later I get an email saying, she was upset and felt angry during the session. Mostly, wanting to cuss and be defiant, even though she did not act that way. She could not understand why she felt like this and was feeling very guilty, as all subs do. She’s very obedient, especially for a newbie, so this is way out of character.

What do you think?

I have a theory… I think a lot of subbies will push, newbies especially but even experienced subs, (Bree still pushes me on occasion). The reason this happens is that they want to know nothing has changed. Security and trust comes from consistency, so if I call them on it it seems all is good and balanced even though they get spanked and whine about how mean I am.

I also asked one of my more experienced subbies what she thought. She’s very smart and intuitive so her take was a bit different. She thought that as an independent woman used to being in control it’s a hard adjustment sometimes. So when you are in a session being disciplined you obviously have no control and sometimes that switch clicks and you just want even a little control. You get defiant or angry or you act out, even knowing there are consequences, because it gives you a little control, if only for a few minutes.

Have any of you gone through this? I know my subbies have. What do you think?

D/s is very powerful is it not?

Be good, or else…

SJ

On your marks. Get set. Spank!

Hello lovelies,

Today is a post about something I talk to a lot of my subbies about… marks.

Some of you may be thinking…Ok SJ we know you’re kind of Dom crazy but marks?

Oh yes, not only marks I feel a sub may deserve but marks she may request!

Did you fall off your collective chits? Still with me here?  lol

Let’s look behind door number one…

Deserved marks…There are some offenses I feel need severity and with severity comes marks, bruising or striping, even welts are not unusual. Now before you all start a campaign to order hit man, my subs all know this out front. I discuss behaviors, consequences and inform them their bottoms can be marked and will be if necessary.

Door number two…

Requested marks…No it’s not a typo. Many of my subbies ask for marks. I can hear some of you…ok SJ we know subbies be crazy but what?? Ask for marks?? It’s true. Now why would that be? Well let’s look behind door number 3…

A showing of penance…Let’s say one of you lovelies were visiting and had a very serious offense for me to take care of, that would be very very painful. I have had subbies say to me at least they had something to show for what they had to go through. Not to mention that’s’ a powerful incentive to behave. Every time you look in the mirror you will think about that session and why your bottom is marked, right?

Of course, I love putting my marks on a subbies bb, lol. Good to be the Dom.

Be good, or else…

SJ

 

Different Strokes

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Hello lovelies,

I want to talk today about spanking. Yes I know, that’s a surprise SJ! Some of you may not realize how many different kinds of spankings there are. Here in the Hayse house I employ quite a few.

Step this way, the tour is about to begin…

Punishment:

This can involve a lot of things and are usually done in the punishment room: hand, brush, heart paddle, school paddle, strap and if you are really bad the cane, rug beater or my thin whip. Hey, don’t panic on me…I said really bad. Also for the cane or something similar I do use the spanking bench to tie you down so that you don’t move and get the stroke in a very bad area. See what an awesome and considerate Dom I am?

Follow me  to the next stop on the tour…

Reminder spankings:

These can be done anywhere usually just hand and a red bottom but not really painful. It’s  just a reminder to be good today.

Welcome spankings:

This is when you visit, it’s a way of welcoming you to our house and a reminder that you are expected to behave. Again, hand and a red bottom but not really painful.

Sub space:

Now you’re back with me right? This is usually done in the bedroom, on our bed or on our massage table   but could be on the futon in punishment room. Now this is the one time you get to have input. A subspace session is all about you and getting you to that kind of out of body zone. You can request your favorite implements,  how hard , how slow  etc. What I do find is that once you are in the zone you can’t really talk so it’s up to me to keep you there. I try to do at least one of these when a subbie visits.

Reward spankings:

Like a reminder but more of a pleasant sting. These are given if you have been very good.

Thank you for taking the tour…You can make your reservations anytime.

Be good, or else…

SJ

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