To Brat or Not to Brat


Hello lovelies,

I wanted to clarify something right out front: A brat is different than a sub who has some bratty behaviors. No I am not crazy, well not entirely, lol.

You see a Dom will run the other way faster than George Lucas will change the Star Wars franchise, if he encounters a brat.

What do I mean by a brat?

Think any reality show: Bad Girls, Jersey Girls, etc. Anything where the females feel entitled and argue and complain 24/7. If any of you are still looking online for a Dom, do not put you are a brat in your profile. Trust me you will never get a response, not from an experienced Dom anyway. You can put “can be bratty at times,” “like to get in trouble,” “push a bit,” etc. This is totally different.

Still not getting me? I was training a brat once, all she did was push, argue, lie, cuss, yell and feel she was entitled to everything in this world. It did not last long. I had to cut her loose as it was too much work, she was too high maintenance and way too much stress.

You see Dom’s expect a sub to exhibit bratty behavior from time to time: pouting, being sassy, procrastinating and other bad habits. But, a brat is just obnoxious, and Dom’s do not fight, nor argue with subs and this is all a brat wants to do. They want to be totally out of control and make every one miserable. So see ya wouldn’t want to be ya. I have no time for brats but will spend any amount of time a sub needs if she just has some bratty behaviors. Feel me?

So remember never put you are a brat in a profile, it’s like Dom kryptonite.

Be good, or else…


I See the Light…Lights

Hey lovelies,

Not all of my posts are about D/s, ok most but this one is not, well a little.

Bree really wanted to go see these lights on display for Christmas. It was kind of a small fair type thing so I had planned on rewarding her for finishing her new book on time. See how nice I am? Anyway, off we go, oh right a sound spanking for her first, just to make sure, lol. (Hey I said most posts right?) We got to the place and started walking around. Bree loves little carnivals and international food booths so she was digging it big time. Anytime she’s smiling is a good day for me, so I was cool with it too. I bought her some food and drinks and we walked around for a while waiting for the lights to come on. She was bratting a little but taking her to the car that was parked in another zip code was not feasible.

Now it’s dark and the lights hit and…huh? really? This is the famous light show thousands of people flock to see? Not exactly Disney (can’t believe I just wrote that) but we had a really nice day together. Plus it was good for her to get out of the house as her new book is pretty dark, and it was getting to her somewhat. She’s really funny most of the time but depending on the book she is writing she can get really quiet or dark or even depressed. Not easy being a bestselling author lovelies. Trust me when I tell you when she writes she is fierce, 12 to 15 hours a day every day. Except for spank breaks, yes there are quite a few, lol. Except for those I hardly see her when she is in the zone, just wanted you guys to know she certainly suffers for her art and for her fans.

Anyway we got home and of course a good spanking because, well I can. She also bratted a bit so not a severe one. Bree loves me to spank her, to a point, so this was not hard and she was smiling. Until I told her the next day we go back to her 2:00 daily appointment for implement reminder spankings.

By the way she has not reported on time for any of them, in over a week, lol. Again, as subbies you know you will get more and harder spanks but still you disobey…crazy. Her smile went from yum to ugggggh pretty quick. I mean she only has about 90 more days to go so what’s the big deal?

I love being a Dom, have I told you all that before? It was great to hang out and she really needed the break from this new book. Be warned it’s really intense and dark but as all her books are just brilliant.

As always be good and you might get taken out to a nice carnival, or it could be or else…



SJ’s Version of the Insanity


Hello my lovelies,

How are you all? I hope at least a few of you have or had a red bottom recently. Here is my version of the latest installment of our very own Desi and Lucy D/s couple, baba oww…get it?

Oh come on, that was good…Ok I digress.

So if you remember from our last episode Bree wrote something on the blog that was improper for public consumption then challenged me by saying she was not scared of me etc.

You all know me and you know this could not be ignored. After grabbing her by the ear and taking her upstairs she was put OTK and her bottom bared for her spanking. Now, after about 25 and Bree’s imitation of an eel on a hot plate trying to wiggle away, I asked her if she was sorry for acting up on the blog. You would think in that position she would apologize and maybe cut the spanking down, right?


Not only did she not apologize, she started mouthing off. Why do subbies do this? You’re pinned down bb getting spanked and you get mouthy? I love you all but you are crazy train sometimes.

After a while she apologized, about 150 spanks later that is. Then, she said she wanted 100 more!

Wow! Really?

Well of course I spanked harder and after about 30 she was yelling she had changed her mind…a little too late that, lol.

Then she wanted 200, and finally 300!!! Each time yelling louder than the last. Finally after about 800 spanks her bottom was the color of the brightest red apple you have ever seen, which I love, as you all know.

After I asked her “Why did you mouth off and get extra? And then ask for more when you were yelling and squirming??”

Her answer…wait for it…She rubbed her bb and said “I’m insane.”

Seems this is a genetic trait in subbies, you lose your minds temporally and get much more than you wanted and do it time and time again. Like I said I love you all but…crazy train!

Be good, or else…


Far From the Long Arm of the Dom!





Hi, Y’all!

Ahhh, peace at last. I’ll be home in another five days, so I intend to enjoy this time– WRITING!

Got a bunch of things to share with you! The Blushing Author Workshop was incredible! Not only did we learn a whole lot of new, nifty things, but the people who attended were AMAZING!  I will honestly say that I walked away with a boat-load of new friends, fresh ideas, and a greater love of the people I work for, and with! As before, Bethany’s love and generosity blew me away.  This is truly my family- and a home away from home. Get the tissues out because when I leave this time, Sob City!

And no, I did not get into any more trouble than I usually am in. Jim Burke has a forest filled with birch trees… and permission from John.  This girl ain’t no dummy!

I particularly want to publically thank three very special people in my life whose love and care have allowed me to focus on my work:

First, of course, is my wonderful husband.  John writes more blog posts that I ever could; he spends hours each day answering emails from people and mentoring, and provides so much emotional and physical support to me that I can’t even begin to describe. Not having him here to bring me my morning coffee is truly missed!  I am so proud of him- he just finished his first book, too.  So John, thank you, my love.  For being you. I miss you soooo badly!

These next two ladies are my best friends and my greatest allies: Isabella and Lily. They are my bookends- keeping me from falling over when the earthquakes of life rattle my world.  When you hear me say “I have people for that”, well, these gals are my people. Lily runs my life- no joking. Without her expertise in social media and organization skillz, I would be lost.  She also provides comic relief when I start going cray cray, and brings me back to reality.  Isa, my princess, is my rudder. She know the perfect thing to say to keep me grounded in the present world.  She, too, makes me laugh when I need to, and has been ‘my precious’.  What blesses me even more is the relationship those two share with each other- with NO drama!  I am sure each of you can relate about how exhausting that is, and I never get it from either of them!  I am one lucky woman to have them in my life and can’t express enough my love for them.

My AMP girls are amazing! We are coming close to ending the first program and they have been working so hard to grow in their art! I am so proud of them. They will tell you that what we do, as writers, is tough. I have pulled them through the ringer to give them a head’s up about this world, and hopefully prepared them for when they are ready to take the step and give it a go.  There is only one thing I cannot prepare them for- that is the, um, unstable people that we sometimes encounter in this genre.

I do my best to answer every legitimate email personally that comes my way (given that I am provided with a legit return email address). Recently, John and I have been pursued by an individual who is on a seek and destroy mission.  She contacted us initially with the intent to meet up as a swinger (we do not do that) and we politely refused her invitation but offered assistance in  helping her find couples who were interested in that type of lifestyle. Although every one of her emails have been answered (except for the one making a twitter like statement), and a response to her comment about us not returning her email was posted on the blog, she has now upped her crazy with threats and nasty comments about us and our readers.  Hence, we have had to enforce moderation of this blog. I am so sorry- but all of you know that all it takes is one unstable person to sour things for others.  You, my readers, deserve the best that I can give you and I am doing my best to deliver that, in both my books and in my personal interaction with each of you.

I want to thank you all for your love and support, and am so very grateful that I have been blessed with an audience of intelligent, loving, and down to earth fans who love my fantasies (and realities) as much as I do.  To each of you- I am sending a Bree-Hug.  God Bless You!

With all My Love,




Positions, Implements, & Strokes…



Hello lovelies, everybody been behaving? Yes, it is a rhetorical question… A lot of times, subbies I am training earn a punishment session. I know, hard to believe, but it does happen. Anyway, every subbie at one time or another always has the same question; Sir, how long will the session be? What will you use? How many strokes? You see, all of you are a very curious lot, and most of you total control freaks. Not putting you down, just stating a fact. And because of this, you want to know everything that’s going to happen, in detail. As a Dom, I do not divulge this, as it would give you too much control. But, I thought I could give you an idea of what I would apply in a session, for the following offenses. Now all of this is subject to change but it will give you at least an idea of what to expect if you are told to report for punishment.

Bratting…Now this is not serious, and all subbies do it. Usually a sound otk spanking by hand- say 100 or so- is enough, along with some corner time. Sometimes you lovelies will be jonsing for a spanking, oh come on it’s me, you know I am right. So you will intentionally brat. The problem with this is usually you go too far, and the spanking is far more painful than you wanted. In fact, most of the time, lol. Now if the bratting persists, a brush or paddle would be added until you behave, but for general bratting my hand is quite enough.

Disrespect, Smart mouth…Now we are getting into definite ow territory. I take disrespect from a sub very seriously, so probably otk dana paddle- 50, wood brush- 50, a sound paddling with wood school paddle bent over- 25. If the behavior does not change, a strap or cane would be needed, depending on how serious the disrespect was.

Speeding, Smoking, Texting while driving…These are all very serious and require severe discipline. Any behavior that endangers yourself or others, is very bad. So welcome to the dungeon! OTK dana paddle- 75, wood brush -75, prison strap- 35, over bench school wood paddle- 35, bent over school cane -15. Trust me, you would remember this one.

Well that’s an idea,  see I’m not so bad! lol To avoid the extremely sore bottom that would result form the things I listed is simple. Just behave. So easy and yet so difficult for you all. Just remember, there are always consequences. Always.

Be good or… Well, see above!


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Subbies and Hammers


OK my lovelies, intriguing title, yes? Here is the deal, if someone hit you on the head with a hammer-no i am not suggesting that-but lets just say for argument’s sake someone hit you on the head with a hammer. And lets say that you knew if you changed a certain behavior, you would not get hit again. That would motivate you to change, correct? I mean, who wants to get hit in the head with a hammer? It hurts, and it is unpleasant. So you know you will get hit again, unless you change the behavior. So you change, seems reasonable to me.

Now lets substitute a paddle, or a strap, or even a hand, for Mr. Hammer. Now same deal. You know the spanking will hurt and be unpleasant, and you know that can be avoided by changing the behavior. Seems logical to expect that you would change, correct? I can see you all nodding your heads. Makes sense SJ. I hear what you are saying. Then something happens, and once again we are getting hit on the head with the hammer. Help us please!!!

My question for all of you is…why do you keep doing things to get hit with the hammer, when all you have to do is change a behavior? Now this is not my first rodeo, so I know there is logic and then there is subbie logic…But really? Help your fellow sisters. Don’t let them get hit on the head with a hammer. Just new mantra, shout it from the mountain tops. Behave! .So simple right? Yeah, I know. lol

Be good or else,


A First Encounter.


Ok lovelies, here’s the dealio. In keeping with the spirit of last post, I am continuing with an original Two act play. Thank you, thank you, kneeling was a nice touch and for those of you who did so.. BB kudos…..

The part of SJ will be played by me. The part of all you subbies, will be played by me. Yes I know, thank you. It is amazing. Oh my, a standing ovation? You are too kind.

Now I said a two act play so act two will be posted next week. Hey, stop pouting. I can hear you all chanting like the end of Freaks– Tell Us Now! Tell Us Now! Tell Us Now! For those of you who have not seen Freaks, one of the most disturbing movies of all time, this chant will mean nothing. For those of you that have , it’s to the rhythm of- One Of Us! One Of Us! Yes it was clever. But I digress…

Act One

I have told you I would be calling you on the day we had decided to meet, and do a real discipline session. I said I would call at 5:00 PM. You  were to be in posistion, BB and answer the phone, “Yes Sir” OK, everybody on board? Curtain up.

You: (in your head) (Ok, you can do this. So he is going to call, and then we meet, and he will spank me. So big deal right? What?! Am I insane? Did Dom aliens kidnap me and implant a crazy thingy in me so I say “yes sir” like a pavlovian sub? No! When he calls, he is going to hear a strong woman. Confident. And I will be making some rules of my own.)

Phone rings off stage… 

You: Screaming ahhh! Hello? I mean, uh uh

SJ: Really?

You: Uh, Hi! I am well. Nice to talk to me. I mean you. I mean. (Oh nice, one I am woman, hear me crumble) OK, wait, I think I am forgetting something.

SJ: What did I tell you about today?

You: (Uh, what did he say? It’s nice out, a good day for the beach? Oh man!)

Dom, Dom, Dom..(played on a double bass off stage)

SJ:I am waiting…

You: Trying to strip, and hold the phone, which you drop in your coffe. Uh, bad connection. Hi Sir.

SJ: And your resoponse should have been?

You: Uh, in position-Hello Sir. (I am toast!!!!!!!)

SJ: Yes, that should have been the response. You will be punished for disobedience, understood?

You: Yes sir (said with a shaky voice)

The audience is moved by my portrayal osf a subbie falling apart, and applause rings out.

SJ: Do you have your clothing for this evening?

You: (Huh? Oh yeah. But do I have everything? Wait a minute, who does he think he is telling me how to dress? I can wear whatever I want. OK, I feel better.) Uh, almost Sir.

You: To audience ….OK OK, cut me some slack!

Back to the play. 

SJ: Well?

You: Uh Sir, I do except for the sheer black panties.

SJ: Explain young lady.

You: (oh man not the young lady thing already …ok don’t panic, you are smart. Probably smarter than meanie giant head so think.. hmmm ok got it) into You know Sir, its really strange, but there is a, a pantie thief in my neighborhood. Yeah, and he only likes black sheer panties, and they were on the line drying, and well… It’s kind of sad Sir, he just kind of stole them .Bummer, huh Sir?

SJ: (Trying not to drop the phone as I am laughing so hard)

You: (What the? Where did that come from? what is wrong with me? I am smart, hes like a demonDom. Ican’t even put a sentence together.)

SJ: Well thats quite a story, would you like to stick with it?

You: (Ok look, your bottom is going to get blistered anyway, just be honest with the guy) Sir I uh, procrastinated and did not plan enough time for the panties to be bought. Sorry Sir. (Ok that was not like horrible. Well it was, but not like Saw or Hostel horrible More like uh 70’s synthizier pop horrible)

SJ: I see. Well I told you if I was denied the sight of you in anything but the proper clothing you would be paddled soundly. Do you remember?

You: Oh god. Yes Sir. I am soooorry.

The audience feels a bit for the subbie character..good job…back to the play

SJ: Now young lady,

You: (Young lady again!!!!!!!!!)

SJ: Where did I say the paddle will be applied, teaching you the lesson you need to learn?

You: (OK don’t panic, you got this, you can do it. Think think) bing light bulb At the Four Seasons Sir .

SJ: Dropping the phone and crying I am laughing so hard.

Another ovation for my portrayal thank you …curtain down ….


Act two next week. And yes, this has kind of happened to me more than once. New subbies are so cute ..

Behave or else!


Force vs. Dom Force



Hello lovelies, did you miss me? Yes, I missed you too. So what in the heck is this blog post about right?  Well let me explain by two different scenarios, and I really want your feedback. So here we go..

Scenario one:  You  have a date and you are getting ready to leave with your man,  but you decide to brat …Oh I know none of you would ever think of such a thing, but just play along. Ok so you start to brat you are warned to behave. You brat more, and are informed you will be spanked, so you laugh and run…Your date catches you, drags you to the couch. As you are fighting, he pulls up the dress and pulls the panties down, and then…spank city. Pretty hot right?  Well hold on.

Scenario two: Same thing but when your date tells you that you are going to be spanked, you start to laugh. But then you get the look…For those of you who know this look, you understand. For those of you who do not, thats too bad. Ask Bree or Nikki, they can explain it to you. Instead of running or laughing, you are transfixed. It’s not that you don’t want to run, but you really cannot look away. Then the Dom says, come. here. now. Well, you know whats going to happen, but you cannot disobey. You walk to where he is seated. He says dress up now. You obey. Then he says, over my lap. Again you obey and you raise your hips submissively as the panties come down.

Now that’s hot …So what did I just teach you? Scenario one is kind of hot but it is physical force. Unless you are a body builder, it is safe to assume your man can over power you. But so what? A vanilla guy can do that. Big deal, right? But scenario two is Dom force. A Dom, a real Dom, never has to physically force you into a position for discipline. The voice, the look, and the vibe, will be irresistible to you even if you know the punishment will be very painful.

So lets hear from you. Force or Dom force? I practice the latter. However, you may have a different take.

Be good or else. FAREWELL FOR NOW,  and lets hear from all of you.


The Implement Must Fit The Crime…




Hello my little subbies, wanna-be’s, and the curious but shy’s…Before I begin, you know how people get together all over the world at a specific hour to chant for world peace?  Well I was thinking, all of you subbies can do the same thing.  Chant your mantra; “its not fair ” who knows, you might save a sub in Sri Lanka from a spanking. What do you think?

So heres the deal. Lets talk implements… Hey come back here. Hear me out. Lets discuss appropriate implements for appropriate offenses. Now every Dom feels differently about this, so this is just my take. First of all, it’s important for a Dom to establish what the rules are, so his sub understands her boundaries. Once these are established, a Dom never relents. So, lets take bratting…Not that any of you would ever act in such a matter, right?  To me a sound hand spanking of around 100 to 300, depending on the brat level, is enough. Now lets go to the other end (yes pun intended) of the scale and look at the offense of speeding. To me, this warrants severity. Why? Because it endangers the sub and innocent drivers. So for something like speeding- hand, wood brush,  paddle, and cane. I know Mr. Meanie.

But heres my point, A sub must understand the difference between a brat spanking and a severe one. A dom cannot or should not cane a sub for bratting. Just as a hand spanking for speeding is ludicrous. And yes there are grey areas where just a paddle or just a brush is appropriate. One more thing, A dom must set a positive example. If he punishes his sub for speeding, then he cannot speed. If he punishes her for smoking, he cannot smoke. Are you hearing me my little ones?

Well thats about it from Domland. Remember, get together and do the chant. Who knows, the bottom you save may be your own!


Be good – or else


Sir John


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Subbie Mantra



Hello subbies, subbies in training, wanna be subbies, and the just curious… Some of you may be aware of meditation techniques. In meditation there is a phrase or word that you use to focus your energy, it is sometimes called a mantra, such as omm, etc.

In D&S subbies also have a mantra, but usually to focus their energy on trying to get out of trouble.

The mantra? “It’s not fair.

How many times have I heard this? Well, Nikki uses it maybe twice- no not a day -an hour!! Bree much less, as she knows it does not have any magic properties and will not help her escape her fate.

So why do subbies try this? Well, it may have worked in the past, or they may think the Dom might have fallen and bumped his head and he has forgotten how to be a Dom, or aliens kidnapped him and took out his Dom gene. Who knows? But boy do they (subbies not aliens) ever try. Now I have to say a Dom must always be consistant in his fairness and meeting out judgement. If he is not, trust me, a subbie will try anything to weasel out or at least lessen their punishment. It’s odd to me then when I inform Nikki she is in for a session in the punishment room, the first thing she says is, yup you guessed it, “It’s not fair!”  She knows it never works but she still says it. Sometimes to the point of irritating me and  earning a longer and more painful spanking…Oh and this did not just happen once, and she learned her lesson… No, no ,no,  it happens all the time. Bree has told her it’s useless but she trys anyway.

So my question to all of you is, why do you keep trying? When you know it will not do any good, and may even earn you more than you were originally supposed to get? Nikki’s second favorite mantra? “Meanie!” I love subbies, but they are a curious lot sometimes. Now I must go and medicate – I mean meditate!   Ommmmmmmmmmmmmm…………

Sir John

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