Subbie Guilt

2015-11-07

Hello lovelies,

I am sure you are all familiar with this heading yes?  I mean subbie’s have more guilt than anyone I know. I love you all but you know it’s true.

I did a session not too long ago. It was a punishment session resulting in marks and a lot of tears, as these kinds of sessions often do. Now during this session something happened. As you all know I am sadistic, but I am all about you being safe in a session so I monitor you closely.

This particular subbie had been hand spanked to tears and was then put over the spanking bench and secured. Her transgressions were serious so she had a paddling and a caning coming. I decided to use the heart first, which as some of you know burns like fire especially on a sore bottom. During this part of her spanking she began to cry again but her breathing became erratic. That’s wasn’t good as she started to hyperventilate, so much so I had to stop and calm her down before her cane strokes.

I had decided to end the session after the cane as I felt she may be at risk if I went any longer. After calming her down I gave her 12 strokes and she was done. I did aftercare, held her, forgave her and made sure she was ok.

It seemed she was so I went downstairs and she went into the living room. When I came in to check on her she was crying. I asked what was wrong and she said she felt bad she could not take what I had planned for her!

I did say you all have more than your share of guilt to drag around did I not? Lol

I explained to her that it’s never a question of me being disappointed if you can’t take as much as I planned for you . It is always a matter of you being safe. You need to learn a lesson, of course, but not at the expense of your health (physical/mental/emotional).

I want you all to get this…a punishment session is meant to hurt but it’s not a matter of taking so much or disappointing me. Every subbie is different. Some can take a lot, some not so much. The important thing is that you feel punished and can let go of the guilt after. Not to put more guilt on top by thinking you disappointed your Dom by not taking enough , that’s not an issue.

You all have enough guilt. Don’t add to it! Lol.

Be good, or else…

SJ

12 thoughts on “Subbie Guilt

  1. I like your blog, their are always food for thought. I can understand that you have to follow though with the punishment, but like you said their is more then just the pain of getting spanked. You judge their emotional state too. Mmmm

  2. I can relate on some level, though a little differently and with quite a bit less guilt, I think lol. A lot of times I get to the pre-freak out stage and if I don’t get a second to process everything and instead the session stops altogether I get upset with myself. Mostly, bc after I do process it I realize I could have taken a whole lot more and it’s a “really?! You freaked out about that?!” situation. So my disappointment is more with myself than you. Though feeling like you are a disappointment is the worst guilt creator ever!

    • does it stop because you have a safe word? I have an emotional safe word for my subs but not one to stop the session because of pain

      • No safe word, seriously lol. It’s not a pain issue bc I’m on the masochistic end, it’s more of a processing issue that can get misinterpreted.

  3. Sir, this sure sounds familiar! I can relate to the feelings that she expressed. Though it is not just guilt (though there is plenty of that). There is also a sadness with feeling that I let you down. That I just wasn’t good enough. I often don’t even understand the feelings until after the session and you have moved on, but somewhere inside I haven’t.

    • You must understand a dom will not be disappointed over how much you can take. It’s all about learning a lesson. It’s not a contest lol.

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