Subbie Guilt

2015-11-07

Hello lovelies,

I am sure you are all familiar with this heading yes?  I mean subbie’s have more guilt than anyone I know. I love you all but you know it’s true.

I did a session not too long ago. It was a punishment session resulting in marks and a lot of tears, as these kinds of sessions often do. Now during this session something happened. As you all know I am sadistic, but I am all about you being safe in a session so I monitor you closely.

This particular subbie had been hand spanked to tears and was then put over the spanking bench and secured. Her transgressions were serious so she had a paddling and a caning coming. I decided to use the heart first, which as some of you know burns like fire especially on a sore bottom. During this part of her spanking she began to cry again but her breathing became erratic. That’s wasn’t good as she started to hyperventilate, so much so I had to stop and calm her down before her cane strokes.

I had decided to end the session after the cane as I felt she may be at risk if I went any longer. After calming her down I gave her 12 strokes and she was done. I did aftercare, held her, forgave her and made sure she was ok.

It seemed she was so I went downstairs and she went into the living room. When I came in to check on her she was crying. I asked what was wrong and she said she felt bad she could not take what I had planned for her!

I did say you all have more than your share of guilt to drag around did I not? Lol

I explained to her that it’s never a question of me being disappointed if you can’t take as much as I planned for you . It is always a matter of you being safe. You need to learn a lesson, of course, but not at the expense of your health (physical/mental/emotional).

I want you all to get this…a punishment session is meant to hurt but it’s not a matter of taking so much or disappointing me. Every subbie is different. Some can take a lot, some not so much. The important thing is that you feel punished and can let go of the guilt after. Not to put more guilt on top by thinking you disappointed your Dom by not taking enough , that’s not an issue.

You all have enough guilt. Don’t add to it! Lol.

Be good, or else…

SJ

Is it or Isn’t it


Hello lovelies,

I trust you all had a suitably creepy Halloween and if you’re like Bree, got lots of CANDY!!!!!
I was discussing an interesting subject with one of my subbies, she was asking “how do I know if I am in sub space?”

A good question and the simple answer is you will know when you’re in it. That doesn’t tell you much so let me try and clarify.

Hey good rhyme, ok I have wasted enough time, oh man I am on a roll! I digress…

This particular subbie had gotten spanked by someone and she was just spent after. Not really talking and just laying over his knee. He told her it was subspace.

Buzz. Sorry, wrong, but thanks for playing.

For those of you fortunate enough to have experienced sub space you know what I am talking about. For those of you who have not, let me give you some idea. Put simply subspace is bliss. Its a feeling that you do not want to ever come down from. Its a high but not an artificial high, it comes from deep within your being.

I know this sounds hippy dippy to a lot of you but just put on your tye-dyed shirts and listen. A sub space experience is like you’re floating but you feel totally safe and any pain that is being applied you do not register it as such. It’s more of a warm sensual massage that just lets you drift off into your own world.

It’s very unusual that you would be able to speak as any interruption in the experience can throw you out.

Its not like this subbies experience where you’re just tired and lay there after a spanking. That’s not even close and usually it takes a while.

A Dom needs to know what he’s doing to get you there. Its a slow build and has to be done correctly. It usually takes 45 mins to an hour to finally achieve the feeling but once there you will know.

It can also last for quite a while after the session. You can have a big drop once you come down which is why the Dom needs to be nearby to talk you through it and be there for you, maybe to hold you or just be close, all subbies are different.

I guess the easier way to say it is if it feels like something you have had before its probably not sub space.

I can tell you this, once you have been there you definately will want to visit a lot. My sincere hope is you all get there at least once.

Be good, or else…
SJ

Feelings and Emotions: Arrrgh!

Hello my lovelies,

How is everyone?

I have a query for all of you and would welcome your input. I was doing a session with one of my subbies, a very sweet newbie. She was not in serious trouble but it was a phone session. It was for a behavior I do not like.

You see, in phone sessions, the subbie cannot fake anything. I hear it all. The self spanks are always much harder and longer.

The session went as usual, and after she was forgiven with hugs I signed off. Later I get an email saying, she was upset and felt angry during the session. Mostly, wanting to cuss and be defiant, even though she did not act that way. She could not understand why she felt like this and was feeling very guilty, as all subs do. She’s very obedient, especially for a newbie, so this is way out of character.

What do you think?

I have a theory… I think a lot of subbies will push, newbies especially but even experienced subs, (Bree still pushes me on occasion). The reason this happens is that they want to know nothing has changed. Security and trust comes from consistency, so if I call them on it it seems all is good and balanced even though they get spanked and whine about how mean I am.

I also asked one of my more experienced subbies what she thought. She’s very smart and intuitive so her take was a bit different. She thought that as an independent woman used to being in control it’s a hard adjustment sometimes. So when you are in a session being disciplined you obviously have no control and sometimes that switch clicks and you just want even a little control. You get defiant or angry or you act out, even knowing there are consequences, because it gives you a little control, if only for a few minutes.

Have any of you gone through this? I know my subbies have. What do you think?

D/s is very powerful is it not?

Be good, or else…

SJ

To Sleep, Perchance to Dream

2015-10-19

Hello lovelies,

As some of you may know, Bree hardly sleeps. I mean I have no idea how she even functions. I, on the other hand, am a different life form and need my sleep.

Last night I was really tired, Bree and I went to bed pretty early. I was sleeping really soundly until I had to take the borders out.  I did, then got back in bed and was in that warm dream state of falling back to sleep when…I felt something tugging my ear…then pinching me and laughing.

“Bree come on, I need to sleep!”

Except Bree is like a border collie, she thinks once she’s awake then everybody should be awake and play. I asked her nicely to stop, trying to explain that people of earth need to sleep but she was not buying it.

She kept saying “I want attention!”

I told her she was about to get it, but she would not like it. Just be still and sleep.

Of course, subbies be crazy, even at 2 in the morning. After about 100 bb spanks and constant owwwwing and whining, she finally went to sleep. I mean a Dom’s work is never done, I swear  24/7 lol.

Be good, or else…

SJ

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