Birthday Spankings

Being Spanked on John’s Birthday! NOT FAIR!

Hi ya’all. I am writing this post under duress. Nope, you do not have a happy Bree right now. Soooooo, yesterday was John’s 198th birthday (or somewhere around there, can’t remember because he’s been around since the dawn of time). We had a wonderful day—I took him to the Birch Aquarium (I should have started thinking about the events right then.. birch…ummm), returned home and played a little bit, and then left for The Marine Room in La Jolla.

20140703_112645Before I go into further detail, this place is the BOMB. Check out the menu! It is amazing and our favorite place to celebrate. I mean, you gotta love gourmet food and fancy settings, plus the view is spectacular. A panoramic of the Pacific Ocean at sunset! How can anything be more romantic? Except…

A Long Island Iced Tea. I mean, come on! I hardly ever drink and it was a celebration, right? Usually, I go for Bellini’s but they did not have the peach puree, so I settled for the next best thing. It was STRONG. As the night went on, I was feeling the effects, and he took it away from me. Mean, huh? And then people actually brought little kids into this place who were yelling! This is a five star restaurant and these people brought a set of two year old twins who did not know how to sit quietly and color. As these children screamed, my nerves started to grind (I know other people’s were too-you could hear the comments), so I simply reached across the table and took a few (ok, maybe almost finishing my LIIT) sips. Yes, right in front of Mr. Meanie Birthday Boy, bold as could be.

I had a reason, right?

He did not think so. We went for a lovely walk on the beach- it was low tide and the waves were warm and then went to return to the valet to get the SUV. That was when he sprung it on me.


“Before we get the truck, you and I have a little date in the back seat.” Ooo, I’m thinking QUICKY! I like quickys…Not.

“What were you thinking? Drinking right in front of me after I said that you had enough?” By then he had my wrist in his hand and was leading me to the parking lot. I started mentally hitting myself in the head for letting him have the combo to the SUV’s electric lock.

“I asked you a question,” he tightened his grip.

“It was expensive and I didn’t want to waste the money.” Can’t blame me for trying, right?

“Try again.”

“The kids were screaming and I didn’t wanna get cranky.”

“They were not that bad and you know that is not an excuse. I can’t believe you just defied me, right in my face!” I hate when he starts scolding. He opened the truck’s door and pointed inside. Think fast, Bree! Here goes-

“You know, I should really get points for not doing it behind your back and choosing to defy you to your face.” Good thing it was dark because I could FEEL the look I got for that smart ass comment.

“Unbelievable,” He choked out. “Get your bottom into the back seat.” Then the fun began. NOT. It was chilly and damp and this man has a hand that feels like a frat paddle. And he was not playing nice. I was squirming and squealing, but you can only move so much when your head is practically under the seat and your feet are jammed against the door.

“The valet is getting a nice show,” John mentioned mid-swing.


“He must have heard your screaming,” John said, pausing. I held my breath, I could hear footsteps! He had his hand resting on my backside and continued, “Plus your nice, red bottom was high enough in the air that the street light was shining on it. Yep,” he resumed the spanking, “you gave him something to dream about tonight.”

Oh My God! Was he using Fourth of July Fireworks on my ass? I bit back what I could of my yelling, praying that the noise was muffled on the carpet. But the spanks were SO loud, they must have echoed through the parking lot. FINALLY, it was over. He pulled my panties back up, smoothed out my dress and sat me up.

“That was fun. I love birthdays,” he said happily.

John was grinning as we returned to get the valet to bring us the truck. No lie, this guy was unsuccessfully hiding a smile as he looked over at me and even whispered to his partner. How humiliating, right? That was when I realized that the windows were cracked open. They had to have heard everything!

I am very happy John had a great birthday. Next year, we stay at home.


40 thoughts on “Birthday Spankings

  1. Ok, so that was funny! Sorry you got a spanking, but you kinda deserved it. We made the mistake of taking our 4 year old grandbaby to a nice restaurant after a loooong day walking around Key West a few weeks ago. She was tired and cranky and it was stupid on our part. She threw her kiddie cup drink (yep she did) and screamed, “I want McDonalds”. We got our food to go, I took her in the bathroom and toaster her tail, then made her apologize to the waitress who had to clean up her mess. Then yes she got McDonalds.

  2. I agree, two y/o twins crying would get on anyone’s last nerve. I at least hope you had a nice before all he11 broke loose.

  3. Oh Bree you are having a bad week. Long Island Ice Tea are not my friend either. Last Christmas at a work celebration a co-worker bought me one of those and I don’t drink and I had to call my husband to come pick me up. He was not happy at all but since he is an alcoholic and I usually have to do all the driving I found it funny. I have children so I understand that they can get cranky in a restaurant but because of that I always took my kids to buffet style places when they were young so we could leave when they had enough. Then again my kids were in bed by 8pm when they were little so I believe that the parents were the ones being selfish to take children that late to a classy place. Reading this helps me to understand why Effin Texas does not allow children under 16 in there restaurant. Hope you all had a Happy 4th.

  4. I’m pouting. John didn’t like how I described his advanced age. He thought it was disrespectful saying he was 198 (of course, said nothing about the dawn of time comment) and said that if I didn’t retract it and apologize, i would be in trouble again And still had to write something. So very well
    My dearest John, I sincerely apologize for letting everyone know you were 198 instead of a derivative of the square root of nine.I loooooooooooove you.

  5. Does make me a bad person that I am SO happy that A: you shared this for our amusement and pleasure. B: that it happened so you’d have something to share. and C: That it was you and not me? 😉 Happy B-day John! 😀

  6. Ok I have to say firstly I have a child. Anytime we were out in public and he was disruptive by crying when he was little I took him outside till he was ok. Certainly not his fault he was a baby but also we are In a public place that others are trying to enjoy so I think that’s just respectful to other people who maybe do not have children. A restaurant is no different than a movie theatre. Bree didn’t say anything she just wanted her drink which SJ should have let her continue to have without punishment.

  7. I love this story! I can see it all now, although I really wish I’d been there…

    @le35 I have 4 children. I’m pretty sure that If I’m going to have my kids out that late at night and not in bed, I’m going to know that they are going to be tired and crabby. There are some really great family restaurants that are more suited to youngsters and also many drive-thrus where you can feed them fast and take them home.

    I’m sure we’ve all been in the grocery store with children throwing a fit and the mom at her whits end. I can sympathize with this mom because this is a normal routine for a mom. And you can tell the difference between annoyingly spoiled children and the ones who are just tired and overwrought.

    Since Bree is the most nurturing and sympathetic person I know, I’d say that these children must have been pretty “annoying” or she wouldn’t have brought them up. And lets say Bree was just having a bad day… who knows?

    The fact is, this is not a parenting blog and the same as you are saying Bree judged the children– you are doing the same to her. You weren’t there to know how bad these particular children were behaving or if in fact Bree was just having a bad day (totally allowed) you judged her for something minor, on a blog with a discipline and Brattty Bree theme. Hmmm, that seems a tad ridiculous to me. Anyone else?

    And– to bring up her being disciplined in the back of a car in a parking lot, on a discipline blog, well, you won’t make a lot of friends that way will you?

    • Actually, I read her blog because I think it’s about as close a look into a BDSM lifestyle as a person might get without actually living in it. I am trying to understand how people think and why they think that way. Another reason I read her blog is because she generally seems accepting of people and their quirks. She knowingly made a choice that she knew could and probably would earn her a spanking (that is where the she knew better comment came from). She judged those parents for doing something socially unacceptable by taking children to a nice restaurant when it was past those children’s bedtime and letting them make noise. Sir John thought they weren’t that bad, so maybe they were but maybe they weren’t. However, she got bugged by someone else’s socially unacceptable behavior. Then and Sir John participated in, what to many people is socially unacceptable behavior. I personally know a one valets who would have been extremely uncomfortable seeing that spanking. My brother did it to pay his way through college and he is as conservative as it gets. He would have been uncomfortable but tried to act it off by smiling.

      She went to a nice restaurant where the family should have gone somewhere else if they were going to have the quirks to act that way. There are a whole bunch of patrons out for their nice night, who walking to their cars, if they saw it, would have been uncomfortable with the spanking. Therefore, for someone who professes not to judge others’ behavior, it seems hypocrisy to me to receive a public spanking while being bothered by others’ public behavior.

      • So I wrote my original comment because I felt she was giving the message “Please love me for my quirks and who I am, and I will love you. Just as long as you aren’t an unruly child or a parent of one.” I thought she deserved to know that it came off as hypocritical. Especially because those parents were a nuisance. There are places where a bottom bared in public where if someone saw it and called in a license plate, you would have a lovely ticket in your mailbox. That’s why I commented to begin with. Breanna seems like she’s usually not judgemental and maybe had a bad day, but the double standard really gets me. I won’t comment again.

  8. I don’t mind kids at restaurants either- but bring two year olds at 800 at night to a five star facility where there is no kid friendly food is unfair to both the kids and to the other patrons. And these kids were screaming, I mean LOUD! The parents just drank and ignored them. And yes, it was way out in a freaking parking lot- NOT where other people would be bothered. well, anyone except me.

  9. LOL, sorry, Bree.
    Happy birthday to John. 🙂

    As far as the kids in the nice restaurant; I totally get your frustration.
    When I do take my children out for dinner, I only do family friendly restaurants. And if they misbehave, or start getting loud, it’s my responsibility to get them calmed down or out of there. I don’t want to disturb anyone else’s dinner.

    (On the other hand, my husband doesn’t really like to take ME out to nice restaurants either. Using the chocolate from the huge dessert fountain, to make swirly mustaches on yourself, is not deemed appropriate table manners, I guess. 🙁 )

  10. Oh my God, I know that “I’m just 18 blabla” but children are MY pet peeve! I totally understand Miss Breanna…

    I wouldn’t mind the spanking, but I would probably cry and never forgive my Dom for public embarrassement, considering I already dislike going out in public…


  11. P.S. It isn’t that you should know better than to get spanked in public. It’s that you were allowed to make your noise, but the children weren’t, simply because they are children. Anyway, mostly, I love your blog. I love how open and honest you are, but you judged that family for not removing unruly children who you don’t know what went on before that in their day. Anyway, I won’t rant anymore.

    • In Miss Breanna’s defence (because I really like her), she was in a parking lot getting SPANKED, and the children were in a restaurant getting delicious meals. They should’ve been quiet and eating.

    • OK I Have to pipe in here regarding kids in restaurants. Generally, I do not mind. Especially at touristy places or family restaurants. But this is a fancy smancy restaurant that costs a fortune and we only go to on special occasions. And I was working, so No I did not get to go. 🙁 But, when you go to a place like this, you should have courtesy for other diners. Perhaps these people can afford that type of place anytime they want so its no big deal to them. But most people go there for special occasions. They want to be able to enjoy themselves without children crying or acting out. Now I am not saying you shouldnt be allowed to bring them, but if they start crying, take them outside. But better yet, get a sitter. Cause really, how enjoyable for the parents is it to have to deal with crying kids? And the menu is NOT kid friendly at all. SO what they ate, I have no clue. It really doesn’t matter what may or may not have gone on with those kids before they took them to the restaurant. If your kid acts out, take them out of the restaurant. Have respect for the other diners. To me, there seems to be a sense of entitlement that they have the right to bring their kids anywhere they want to no matter how disruptive they are.I think thats sad.

    • Firstly don’t judge Bree and say she was judging that family. You weren’t there and you don’t know her personally. If you did you would know that simply isn’t the case. Sounds like Ur the judgemental one. An comparing a distant parking lot with a five star restaurant? Really?

      * insert eye roll *

  12. This is your blog, and I know you were at a fancy restaurant, but children are people too. I almost just didn’t comment, but this is a pet peeve of mine. You getting spanked and having your bottom bare where other people can hear your noise is acceptable, but the children’s noise was not acceptable. The children were at least not old enough to know better.

    • I think you summed it up very well actually. The children were at least not old enough to know better but the parent definitely were. Kids, especially toddlers make noise (let me tell you, mine’s LOUD) but there is a certain awareness and consideration of others you need to have in public, especially when you’re sharing a space with others for an extended period of time. I don’t expect miracles of mine nor anybody else’s but I do hope that if the situation came to it I, or any other parent, would be reasonable and figure out a way to fix the problem or call it a night.

      P.S. Lol! Sorry Bree but someone has to get spanked over there and we know it’s not John.
      P.P.S. Happy Birthday!

  13. Oh tears streaming down my face. Sorry Bree I’m safely having fun at your expense. You can take it out on me sometime soon. I’m sure it wasn’t fun for you at all and I’m equally sure SJ enjoyed it thoroughly! A belated happy Birthday to you Sir John! Hope you have a great 4th of July everyone!

  14. Oh my! That was pretty mean. Could’ve waited till you got home at the very least. I like kids, I do, but not while I’m eating in a restaurant and they are being loud!

    Happy belated birthday, btw John!!!

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