Positions, Implements, & Strokes…

 

SPANKING

Hello lovelies, everybody been behaving? Yes, it is a rhetorical question… A lot of times, subbies I am training earn a punishment session. I know, hard to believe, but it does happen. Anyway, every subbie at one time or another always has the same question; Sir, how long will the session be? What will you use? How many strokes? You see, all of you are a very curious lot, and most of you total control freaks. Not putting you down, just stating a fact. And because of this, you want to know everything that’s going to happen, in detail. As a Dom, I do not divulge this, as it would give you too much control. But, I thought I could give you an idea of what I would apply in a session, for the following offenses. Now all of this is subject to change but it will give you at least an idea of what to expect if you are told to report for punishment.

Bratting…Now this is not serious, and all subbies do it. Usually a sound otk spanking by hand- say 100 or so- is enough, along with some corner time. Sometimes you lovelies will be jonsing for a spanking, oh come on it’s me, you know I am right. So you will intentionally brat. The problem with this is usually you go too far, and the spanking is far more painful than you wanted. In fact, most of the time, lol. Now if the bratting persists, a brush or paddle would be added until you behave, but for general bratting my hand is quite enough.

Disrespect, Smart mouth…Now we are getting into definite ow territory. I take disrespect from a sub very seriously, so probably otk dana paddle- 50, wood brush- 50, a sound paddling with wood school paddle bent over- 25. If the behavior does not change, a strap or cane would be needed, depending on how serious the disrespect was.

Speeding, Smoking, Texting while driving…These are all very serious and require severe discipline. Any behavior that endangers yourself or others, is very bad. So welcome to the dungeon! OTK dana paddle- 75, wood brush -75, prison strap- 35, over bench school wood paddle- 35, bent over school cane -15. Trust me, you would remember this one.

Well that’s an idea,  see I’m not so bad! lol To avoid the extremely sore bottom that would result form the things I listed is simple. Just behave. So easy and yet so difficult for you all. Just remember, there are always consequences. Always.

Be good or… Well, see above!

SJ

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Negotiating A Scene

 

rules-list-on-paper2

This was a topic suggested to me by a wise subbie, and since we have all seen what can happen at parties lately I want to address this. So lovelies, here’s the 411 on negotiating a scene.

First, you need to know what you want. Some of you may want full bare bottom spanks. Some want your panties up. Some may like leather…OK all of you like leather, lol. Some may want to be scolded while being spanked etc. Whatever it is, you need to know, before you go to a party. Now let me be clear, the reason a safe party environment is good for subbies to attend is, ironically why i do not go to parties. And that reason is, all together now, the subbies are in control. Hey, not everyone said it, did you not know this? Let me enlighten you.

A party is a place for you to act on your fantasies. It is not a real D/s session. In a real D/s session you are not in control, but a party session you are in total control. Now what does that mean? Simply that, before you enter into a session, you tell the Dom or top, what you will, and will not do. What implements you like or do not. Panties up or down, also any physical problems you may have, shoulders, back, knees, etc. that may be a problem in position. You have a safe word , you can slow things down, have it be harder spanks or softer, take a break etc. So I hear the wheels turning, and you may be thinking well gee SJ, what does that have to do with submitting to a Dom? Well, nothing. That’s my point.

Parties are play scenarios not punishment ones, so know that going in. Here’s how it works. Somebody will host a scene in his or her suite. This is usually a big room with many people attending. Some couples, some singles. The spankings are done there in front of everyone…so you closet exhibitionist can have fun lol and always panties or thong up, always…Now there are private rooms off the main one. These may have more intense scenes but still nothing like a real D/s punishment session. It is ok to use those rooms since they are right there a tons of people walk in and out. But never go to a private, one on one in a small room where nobody knows you or where you are, unless you know the top or Dom. This could be bad, really bad.

There is security at some parties, and at some not any, so be careful. If any of your limitations are violated…any…go right to the host. He or she should handle things immediately and eject the violator. If you do go to the host, and nothing is done pack up. Consider you had an experience and go home, you are not in a safe environment and that’s the most important thing for you. Most parties are fine and safe, so don’t let me scare you away. But you need to check out who is giving them and their track record.

So do you all get it? If you do your homework and know what you want, you can go and have an enjoyable experience. Be respectful, but speak up. If you do not tell the top no hairbrush, and he smacks you with one, you cannot start whining and making a scene. Take care of yourself, and speak up. This is your chance to explore some fantasies. Above all be safe.

Be good or else!

SJ

Subbies and Hammers

hammer

OK my lovelies, intriguing title, yes? Here is the deal, if someone hit you on the head with a hammer-no i am not suggesting that-but lets just say for argument’s sake someone hit you on the head with a hammer. And lets say that you knew if you changed a certain behavior, you would not get hit again. That would motivate you to change, correct? I mean, who wants to get hit in the head with a hammer? It hurts, and it is unpleasant. So you know you will get hit again, unless you change the behavior. So you change, seems reasonable to me.

Now lets substitute a paddle, or a strap, or even a hand, for Mr. Hammer. Now same deal. You know the spanking will hurt and be unpleasant, and you know that can be avoided by changing the behavior. Seems logical to expect that you would change, correct? I can see you all nodding your heads. Makes sense SJ. I hear what you are saying. Then something happens, and once again we are getting hit on the head with the hammer. Help us please!!!

My question for all of you is…why do you keep doing things to get hit with the hammer, when all you have to do is change a behavior? Now this is not my first rodeo, so I know there is logic and then there is subbie logic…But really? Help your fellow sisters. Don’t let them get hit on the head with a hammer. Just new mantra, shout it from the mountain tops. Behave! .So simple right? Yeah, I know. lol

Be good or else,

SJ

CAUTION…Safety at Play Parties

Caution

Ok lovelies I have something very important I need to talk to you about…safety at play parties. What happens when you find yourself in an uncomfortable and unsafe situation at a play party? What do you do and how do you handle it?

It goes without saying that I never want this to happen to any of you, but just in case this is good information to have. First off let’s get something straight; no matter what you wear, how you act, what you say or anything of the sort; this does not give anybody Dom/Top, Male or Female any right to force themselves on you. Personally, I question the way a lot of females dress, it just shows poor judgment in my opinion but, it’s not an invite for any scumbag that thinks “you are asking for it.” When a male invades your space it is wrong, end of story. There are no grey areas (major points to me for not saying shades of grey, too easy).

So what do you do? First off, you get your limits settled before anything. What you are okay with happening and what you are not. You also establish a safe word. For me, this is the absolute best way of telling someone to STOP immediately.

Ok so let’s say you want to keep your panties up during a spanking, that’s your right. Let’s say this jerk yanks them down. You say your safe word immediately. When he stops you go straight to whoever is in charge and report it. If this guy is not ejected immediately then you are in an unsafe environment and you need to leave. Make sure you have the name of who was in charge and the jerk that broke the rules. I suggest later posting them for as many subbies as you can think of.

So what if he does not stop when you yell a safe word? Any Dom within earshot should intervene. Once the incident is over you should then report it. If you stay at the party, tell as many subbies as you can and point this guy out so he does not try that again. If this or any of your limits are breached, it unfortunately does happen, BUT it’s not your fault. No matter what, you are never to feel obligated to do anything that does not feel right to you…Ever.

My girl was sexually molested, that’s a fact. Though the Dom in charge did not know about it at the time, when he was made aware he did nothing. A warning was issued and nothing more. In my opinion that situation is and remains unsafe when a wanna-be-Dom, that does not care about protecting subbies, remains at the party.

With all that being said, here is some important information for any of you that attend play parties. The predator calls himself Ben, but he could go by others. He is around 70 years old and has short grey hair. He is short in stature, around 5’5” or 5’6”. He is known to frequent large spanking parties throughout the US and also small private ones. If he sounds familiar to any of you please pass this on to your sister subbies. It’s our responsibility to protect each other.

Be Safe!

SJ

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